9Tuesday, December 27, 2005
hw shall i round up todae. okie...I HATE TODAE N NVR WISH TODAE WILL HAPPEN AGAIN!
woek up taode by my naggy mother hu dun understand her own child...always demand wad she wans n nvr ever c de condition of de child..jus as long as she hav wad she wan she is happi...she dun care wad others feel...i totaly think tt i'm born to de wrong family..sometimes i jus wan to scream at dem...sumtimes i feel like staying alone...i like being alone...hw i wish my rm has a toilet kitchen n referigitator...so i can b der 24/7 unless i'm goin out of my hse...
anyways dey hate mi wad..my whole family is against mi..i feel tt my fwenz r my everyting..i dun wan to lose dem all...all my fwenz in btp are like my sis n bro...cuz realli i jus couldn't count on my real sis n bro...dey always turn dwn on mi wen i'm in need...i feel i'm in de family but i'm dead...as if i'm a ghost.. wenever i'm in my rm dey r happi having fun together...but wen i went out to tek sumting where dey happens to be at...dey gt all tensed up..as if i'm a ghost n dey r sacred of mi..realli i dun belong...
todae my dad turn against mi...he din tok to mi at all...i dunnoe y..my sis still nt toking to mi...my bro hate mi fer i dunnoe wad reasons...my mum keeps on nagging at mi fer stupid reason..n i hav been giving in so many times until i nw piss like fuck...hate it mans...hav a family but like i hav a bunch of enemies living wid mi...
my mum told poy tt i'm quiting le...i think its gd...cuz i c no reason fer mi to stay der..i hav my o's n studies r far mor imporant den wrk at tis point of tym..n ppl hate mi..n i hate it..i wrk to serve de customer n nt to serve dem...i'm nt der to be push ard...becuz of wrk n de love i had fer pizza hut...i try to control all my emotions n egos to myself till i finish wrk den i vomit it al out to my fwenz....but if it weren't fer de love i had fer pizza hut, u will nt be seeing taking orders frm u all...but i hav stand it fer quite a while n i could n ot stand any longer...mayb after o's wen syuk is a manager als..i'll go to his outlet n wrk fer him...it will be far batta off...having my fwenz n de wrk i love w/o any ppl hating mi n i dun hav to tek orders frm de person hu is nt in charge..
hmm itz seem as if de whole amos four is having problems of their own...except fer amanda..
mi family prob n him..i dunnoe if i shld wait or nt..i jus hate waiting..waiting is tiring n certainly im nt de patience type of person..i wish i can b free on chinese new yr...even if it fer a while to c him is gd enuf...n i wan to find my inspiration fer my dnt o level project der...he gave mi lots of inspiration wenever i'm wid him...but realli i dunnoe if i can wait any longer...
nani n sharon hav personal probs tt i dun wan to tok abt here cuz itz internet,..if u wan to noe ask dem...
nw feeling so fucked up cuz i hate being in tis hse...i realli dun feel tt i belong...mayb i shld tek sum time off n go sumwhere else stay...
1 by1 every 1 leaving...by the tym i need dem will dey still be ard...i jus dunnnoe...haiz...anayways i did my hwks...nw left half of chem,physic n malay...n de whole of ss...mayb i'll finish chem n physic b4 i go to bed...n tml i'll do malay b4 i go out...n by den i onli left ss...
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